La Paz, Bolivia. The highest city in the world with an elevation reaching just under 12,000 feet. Resting on the Andes’ Altiplano plateau, it’s a gritty city filled with extreme geography, chaotic streets, bustling markets, and peaceful plazas. It’s a place that will flood your senses and literally take your breath away.
Filled with both poverty and wealth, on one corner you’ll see armed guards toting semi-automatics as dapper businessmen go about their day. And on the contrary, vibrantly dressed Native Bolivians and ski-masked shoe shiners trying to make ends meet. It’s a place that contradicts and reinvents itself throughout its various barrios.
Maybe you’ve heard of La Paz, because of Mi Teleférico, the city’s expansive aerial cable car system utilizing modern-day ski gondolas. Or the Cholita Wrestlers of the neighboring El Alto. Who are battling not only in the ring, but for resistance to the violence surrounding them and fighting against domestic abuse, gender stereotypes, and discrimination that indigenous women in Bolivia have endured.
La Paz is known for many things, but if you’re on the Gringo Trail and a backpacker, there’s a chance you’ve heard of La Paz because of its infamous San Pedro Prison.
San Pedro Prison
The notorious Penal de San Pedro is one of the most dangerous, lawless institutions you will find anywhere on earth. Ran by inmates, who pay to rent their cells, life inside Bolivia’s largest prison is like nowhere else. The state supplies the prison with its basic needs, but it does not have the power to interfere with the prison’s inner workings.
The prison is ruled by elected leaders, all of which happen to be detainees of San Pedro. Originally designed for 600 inmates, there are 1,500 prisoners with over 3,000 inhabitants in total because many live inside with their families, including wives and children.
“You better not take that photo! They’ll take your phone and smash it!” – Crazy Dave
Here is where it gets a little wild. For the right price, visitors (are)were allowed to stay in the prison for up to extended periods of time. The prison even conducts tours for the bravest or dumbest of backpackers who want to get a taste of life inside or a taste of its famous nose candy. The main source of income for inmates comes from the sale of cocaine to tourists who visit the prison, and from renting their accommodations.
This was all made famous and documented in the book Marching Powder by Rusty Young. Marching Powder is the true story of a British-Tanzanian man, Thomas McFadden, convicted of drug trafficking, who made a living running tours for backpackers inside San Pedro. It turns out, our new friend who we are about to meet happens to be a prominent character in the book.
First Impressions
After exploring the city for a few hours, our legs were tired and we were ready to treat ourselves to an afternoon pint. The World Cup was on so we found a local watering hole and settled in. Vito had decided to step outside for a moment to check out the sun setting over the city with snow-capped, Mt. Illimani as its backdrop.
When he came back inside he had claimed to have just met one of the wildest humans he had ever come across in our travels. The man, who happened to be barefoot, was really friendly and ecstatic to have come across a fellow New Yorker as he himself was a native of the big apple. The mysterious character who claimed to have done time in San Pedro Prison was dressed in an old football jersey styled with a du-rag and talked a mile a minute.
After bullshitting for a few minutes reminising about NYC, and giving some tips on navigating La Paz, he concluded that we should meet him tomorrow to check out his walking tour. They shook hands and he introduced himself as Crazy Dave. A fitting name that suited his larger-than-life persona.
There was something about this guy. He was an enigma. He seemed a little off his hinges yet articulate and well-spoken at the same time. Vito, who was blown away by his conversation, tried to put into words the experience he had just encountered. I wasn’t exactly sure what to make of the interaction until he handed me the flyer. What is his deal? How the hell did he end up here, it must be one hell of a story.
We gotta find Crazy Dave.
Who is Crazy Dave
Crazy Dave is a product of Washington Heights, born and raised in New York City. Dave was once a normal guy with big dreams of becoming a rockstar. He played shows in Lower Manhattan regularly and even performed with Axl Rose once upon a time. His dream of becoming a rockstar was quickly derailed as he worked multiple jobs to support his wife and their two children.
His whole world would soon be shattered when he discovered his wife got knocked up by their local coke-dealing delivery boy. Dave’s world fell apart in a downward spiral into the firm grip of the addictive drug, eventually landing him on the streets. Dave now was living the life of a rockstar without the guitar, putting all his money up his nose. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Down on his luck, A mob boss offered him $30,000 to relocate to Bolivia and act as the man on the ground. Dave thought I could pay my child support and spend the rest of the money on a little “party hardy” as he liked to call it. The plan was easy and due to his dark skin and Boriquan heritage, he’d fit right in. Learn Spanish, adapt like a local, and be the contact point for moving weight back to the US. Dave was sold on the idea and showed up the next day, passport in hand.
He boarded the first flight out and was given $2,000 cash and a room at the La Paz Holiday Inn. The only problem was, Dave thought Bolivia was in Africa. Classic Dave.
You see boys and girls…It’s like thiiiiiiiiiiiiiiis
Crazy Dave
Long story short, fast forward to the mid-nineties…Dave was busted at the La Paz airport while attempting to smuggle 8.5 kilos of liquified cocaine in a six-pack of beer bottles back to the US. He was sentenced to 16 years in the infamous prison.
Dave is convinced he was a decoy for a larger payload and took the wrap because he was a gringo. He committed the crime and now he had to do the time. But this is no ordinary penitentiary. Dave spent 14 years in San Pedro and the rest is history.
Crazy Dave’s Delirium; A Tour
With a larger-than-life personality, Dave hosts his story time every day rain or shine. Though he was dealt a shitty hand, Dave has a surprisingly optimistic outlook on life. He dives into details and explains how he managed to stay alive in a place like San Pedro. Dave’s got main character energy and there is no doubt he is the star of his one-man show. A spectacular storyteller, Dave recalls his time in the prison. He gives a real unfiltered look at the bizarre things that happened inside. Dave will shed light on a few things like…
- What happeneds when Brazilian prostitutes were flown in for the head honchos of the jail. And how they equipped their lavish cells with hot tubs and big-screen TVs.
- How he damaged his skin manufacturing cocaine in a makeshift lab inside the prison. Or how they grew weed plants on the top floor of the complex.
- He breaks down what it’s like for families and children inside the prison. How he used to complete the English homework for other inmates’ kids and got paid in a few grams of snow.
- He’ll talk Marching Powder with you, facts, and fiction. How he hasn’t seen a penny or even an honorable mention from the popularity of the book. He’ll stake a claim on why he’s a better fit than Brad Pitt for the role if the Marching Powder movie ever goes to production.
Upon the conclusion of his tour, Dave hosts a Q&A. I asked him if he ever wanted to go back inside San Pedro. His answer :
“HELL NO!”
Dave is clean now and spends his time giving his Crazy Dave Delirium tour in hopes of a few bucks and some food to keep himself going. Homeless, Dave uses the bolivianos he earns to pay off the local police to allow him to continue operating his tours.
Every day at 1 pm you can catch Dave’s one-man show at Plaza Sucre in La Paz. For an entertaining afternoon with stories that you won’t believe, give Dave’s tour a try. He won’t be too hard to find. Better yet Crazy Dave will find you.
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READY TO VISIT LA PAZ & MEET CRAZY DAVE?!
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I LOOK FORWARD TO HEARING AND SEEING MORE.